Over 30s dating
Over 30s dating
The more you get to know somebody, the better the sex will be.’’ It’s all very well to consider when it’s best to start having sex but for women in their 30s the problem can be meeting a man in the first place.Bill Phelan, co-founder of the dating agency Two’s Company, says that the over-30s age group is the fastest growing at his agency and he believes the women are joining because they are fed-up with the pub/club dating scene.
“Good sex is sometimes confused with love; some couples overlook problematic aspects of their relationship that ultimately matter more in the long run.’’ However, despite these findings, it also appears some women over 30 could be more likely to have sex on the first date, than any other age group.Dr Ronni Greenwood, a social psychologist lecturer at the University of Limerick, agrees, adding that as women age, they start to become ‘invisible’ which can also bring a certain freedom.“The gaze is on the younger women and not on you anymore, but our confidence levels change,’’ says Greenwood.David Kavanagh, a couples counsellor who runs the Avalon pre-marriage courses, believes this could be the case.“I do think people make the mistake of thinking sex early on in a relationship is a positive thing as it shows there is chemistry.“Even though we are more beautiful and youthful at 25 rather than 35, we now know who we are, what we want, what pleases us and how to go and get it.’’ Perhaps not surprisingly, the decline of the Catholic Church’s influence over our sex lives and the availability of contraception have also impacted women’s lives.
“It is not that long ago that contraception was illegal in Ireland, so a lot of things have moved forward very, very fast,’’ says Greenwood.
Teresa Bergin, a sex therapist at Mind and Body Works in Dublin, says women need to feel free and comfortable’ to make their own choices in their relationship whatever their age.
“Women are educating themselves about their own health and sexuality.
Instead, if you wait, the chances of fulfilling your dreams and finding ‘the one’ will increase.
This research by a team at Cornell University, New York, found couples benefited from taking things slowly, as they learnt exactly how compatible they were and also when they did eventually have sex, it was better because of the wait.
ARE you single, over 30 and looking for a loving longterm relationship?